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By Christina Schmidt, MS

Ah, the joys of mealtime with a toddler! You know how critical it is that she gets a balanced, fruit-and-veggie-rich diet.  Unfortunately, Little Miss Persnickety didn’t get the memo. If she’s not shoving her plate away because the corn is touching the peaches, she’s flailing on the floor because you insisted she eat “one more broccoli tree” before getting a cookie. As you wearily give in and heat up yet another batch of frozen chicken nuggets, you wonder: Does the dinner table have to be a war zone every evening?

Absolutely not. You and your toddler can come to an understanding. You can help her overcome her food hang-ups and learn to love —or at least tolerate—the nutritious fare that helps her grow strong and healthy. You can tame the tantrums and make dinnertime a peaceful respite at the end of a stressful day.

After both Mom and Dad have put in long hours at work, being confronted with a toddler who won ’t eat his veggies can be the final straw. Good intentions go out the window. It’s too easy to just give up, give in and give the child a bowl of instant macaroni and be done with it.

That reality is what inspired me to write my new book, The Toddler Bistro: Child-Approved Recipes and Expert Nutrition Advice for the Toddler Years , a nutrition guide, cookbook and how-to for busy parents of toddlers with picky palettes and erratic eating habits. I felt the need to come up with quick and simple recipes to help stressed-out moms and dads with mealtime meltdowns.

My research and writing about toddler nutrition was literally demanded by the multitudes of confused and bewildered parents who want to know how and what in the world to feed their toddlers.

The Toddler Bistro is written for moms and dads who might feel as if they’re stuck in a rut of preparing the same foods over and over again because it’s the only thing their child will eat. It’s also for parents who want to make sure their tots are eating the right foods in the right quantities. Read on for some of my tips for parents who are seeking a little meal time help:

Oh yes, it’s personal. Your toddler’s personality plays a huge role when it comes to how he or she will respond to new foods. For example, independent children may prefer to have their own toddler-sized eating area, while your short-attention-spanned child might be prone to grazing, rarely sitting down for an entire meal. If “no” is your tyke’s favorite word, then offer limited choices so he has fewer things to say “no” to.

Try to understand your child’s point of view. A big new world of discovery surrounds your child every day. He

Due to their fluctuating appetites, skipping a meal or two is normal for most toddlers. It ’s very important to allow them to listen to their own internal hunger cues. Healthy toddlers self-regulate their food intake surprisingly well.  Also be aware of appetite busters such as grazing, teething, colds, ear infections, fatigue, stress, inactivity, filling up on fluids such as milk or juice before a meal or short attention spans.

Growth spurts are still common occurrences with toddlers, so don’t be alarmed if you do have days when your toddler wolfs down everything in sight. Your child knows when he or she is hungry.

If at first you don’t succeed...try, try again. Giving up too soon and labeling your toddler as a certain type of eater is the number one mistake parents make in regards to feeding their kids. Research shows that it takes eight to 15 times of introducing a new food to a child for him to accept it. Unfortunately, most parents tend to give up after three tries, missing a golden opportunity to add something new to their child ’s menu. Persistent and frequent offerings of a certain food does take a little patience, but one day your tyke will come around and realize that he actually does like broccoli and carrots.

Try not to react dramatically if your child turns his nose up to a food, and resist the urge to label him as the “hater of all that is green.” He will pick up on your reaction and repeat his behavior again and again. Remain nonchalant and try to offer it again at a later date.

Put your little buddy on kitchen duty. If you think about it, your experience in the kitchen directly reflects your own comfort level with experimenting when it comes to new food tastes and combinations. Allowing children to participate in age appropriate tasks in the kitchen  gives them a sense that they participated in the process of preparing their meal. The sense of pride and ownership they feel will make them excited to share it with the rest of the family, and therefore more likely to become a participating member at mealtimes.

Remember that french fries are not a healthy vegetable. Okay, let’s face it—most of us succumb to fast food at some point. It tastes good, it’s easy and it comes with toys—a winning combination for parents of picky eaters who are already strapped for time. Yet despite what the marketing execs at fast food chains want you to think, french fries are not a healthy vegetable choice. Not

Think outside the (pizza) box. We’ve all been guilty of giving in to the pleasures of unhealthy foods. Quite simply, they taste good. The good news is that most kid-favorite comfort foods, such as mac ‘n cheese, grilled cheese sandwiches, hot dogs, french fries and pizza, can be easily adapted into healthier versions.

The apple of your eye will notice that apple on your plate. Your children learn a lot from you, and they are picking up on your habits whether you realize it or not. They look to your behaviors and habits to know how to act, so make sure you are setting a healthy example. Eat healthy foods in front of your children.

Sugar, salt and spice are not always so nice. Americans eat a lot of sugar. In a nation where diabetes and obesity are such prevalent issues, parents need to learn how to start skimming some sugar from their children ’s diets by checking food labels and offering up healthier options. And sugar isn’t the only culprit—salt can be a big problem, too.

We already get plenty of salt naturally in our diets, so do your best to keep that shaker off the table.  Remember that fast foods and processed foods are salt magnets, so limiting your toddler ’s salt intake is a must.

Make sure all spices are introduced slowly to your toddler. Children have more sensitivity to flavors than adults.

It’s never too early, or too late, to start introducing nutritional and healthy foods to your toddler. By working with your child and introducing a healthy variety of foods today, you ’re helping him get the nutrients he needs to grow a healthy body. Remember, you really are what you eat, so use the formative years as an opportunity to encourage your child to make healthy eating choices and create healthy habits that will last him his whole life through. l